The Art of Flirting by Joe Vetromile
Flirting is the way most people determine whether or
not a member of the opposite sex is interested in them.
Following is a quick outline on how you should go about
the complex, sometimes fun, sometimes not so fun, task
of flirting. It all beings with your approach.
The Approach
One person approaches the other. They move into closer
physical proximity. This much is clear: NO approach
equals NO possibility of initiating contact. You must
approach!
Example: A woman sits down next to a man in a coffee
shop, or a man stands near a woman in a dance club.
This is the first step. Once you approach, you begin
looking for the signs.
The Signs
The person who has been approached will always signal
the other’s presence in some way…a sign.
This signal is not like a train whistle, however, more
a subtle body language which you can learn to recognize.
For example, he or she simply may look up, move over
to make room, nod slightly, or signal with a glancing
eye contact.
A display of total obliviousness to the one who is
approaching generally indicates lack of interest altogether.
Don’t be discouraged. But if the one you approached
shows absolutely no interest, then it’s time to
re-group and try again. But let’s say the approach
works. You have your positive acknowledgement, now what?
Time to talk
The Verbal Exchange
The two people may then engage in a mild verbal exchange
about impersonal, unimportant matters such as the weather
or the scene around them. The key word here is MILD.
This is the classic place for the clever “line,”
but cleverness is not required. At this point, a verbal
exchange is not for the purpose of sharing valuable
insights about life or determining philosophical compatibility.
It is just a vehicle to further the developing contact.
Examples: Verbal overtures might include anything from
“please pass the pickles” to “your
looking great tonight”, to “have you seen
the waitress?”. Without some form of verbal response,
it is highly unlikely that the next step will occur.
Let’s say all is going as planned. Time for body
language.
Body Language
Over a period of time, a couple that has begun to talk
may also begin to orient themselves physically to one
another, to turn toward one another until, if all is
goes well, they are fully facing one another. This is
your goal.
This step can take minutes or hours . . . or weeks
or months . . . to achieve. Yet, without this physical
reorientation toward one another, not very much can
ever happen, so give up on people who turn their back
toward you for long periods of time! But if they don’t…
Touching
The woman or the man (most often the woman) touches
the other in a light, fleeting way. Examples: A couple
might accidentally brush their hands against one another
while reaching for a drink, or the woman might pat the
man on the arm in the middle of a shared joke. The exchange
of very subtle, almost glancing touches may continue
for some while, and if all goes well, can escalate into
the casual affections shown by couples who are dating.
If you’ve reached this point, then flirting has
now become the beginning of a relationship. The Art
of Flirting should always end with the beginning of
a relationship. Now get out there and flirt.
The Art of Flirting is really the Art of making first
contact. You only have one shot at making a great first
impression. By following some of the guidelines we’ve
established in this article, you should now be equipped
to locate, approach, and ascertain whether or not your
subtle flirting has opened the doors to a new and exciting
relationship.
My name is Joe Vetromile, and I’m an author/screenwriter
living in So. California. I’ve written hundreds
of articles on the subjects of flirting, dating and
breaking-up. Besides having first hand experience with
all three, my research on the art of dating confirms
to me that while the ritual of hooking up with a soul-mate
may be arduous at times, the end result of finding that
perfect someone to share the rest of your life with,
is well worth the effort.
Joe Vetromile writes for DrDating – a web site
for anyone looking for love online. We have hundreds
of articles, E-Books and links to some great dating
and love sites all over the world. DrDating also offers
reviews of some of the most popular dating sites and
books.
http://www.DrDating.com
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